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FIFA Probe may lead to new Thrupiece inquiry

Writer's picture: Professor Brian ThrupieceProfessor Brian Thrupiece

Swiss authorities investigating former FIFA President Sepp Blatter have stumbled upon evidence which may throw further light on the mysterious circumstances of the death of Professor Brian Thrupiece in the Hotel Cornavaro, Swiss newspaper Basler Zeitung reported today. The normally tight-lipped investigators - who would neither confirm not deny that the US Federal authorities were also involved - indicated that Mr Blatter and several other FIFA officials were present in the hotel on the night in question and that rumours of a meeting between them and the Professor were not entirely without foundation. Professor Thrupiece's last known communication - a note left in his room for "good time girl" Shelley Lulette Sizemore - merely indicated that he had popped out "for the usual", though precisely what this referred to has remained unclear.

Chief investigator Kurt du Lac would say only that a log of purchases charged to the Professor's room included an undisclosed "film" and possibly a sports (soccer) match. "Since the Professor may have been watching soccer and since FIFA is an organisation with secret soccer connections, the probable link is obvious", Mr du Lac told a packed press conference. Neither Mr Blatter nor Professor Thrupiece were available for comment, the latter for "reasons obvious to almost everyone" Mr du Lac added.


Mr Blatter with admirers. Asked if Mr Blatter was "a big man", Shirley Bassey tribute artiste Burly Chassis [left] answered in no uncertain terms.


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DISCLAIMER: Though it will be perfectly obvious that the absurd world of Professor Thrupiece and his corporate affairs is no more nor less than the product of a fevered brain, it is clearly affirmed here that any resemblance to actual persons, organisations or events is purely coincidental and that no slight or injury of any kind is intended to any person alive, dead or yet to be born.

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